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She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
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