Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?

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(206): View more from Washington

I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill

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(319): View more from Iowa

I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online

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(310): View more from California

He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.

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23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
Read it at the TFLN blog
(435): View more from Utah

Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...

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(239): View more from Florida

You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.

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(509): View more from Washington

You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.

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(352): View more from Florida

The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"

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(802): View more from Vermont

Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE

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