turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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