Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize