Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize