i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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