is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
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