Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
