you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
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