so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
