I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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