I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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