this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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