how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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