____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
