i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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