i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
