what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
