ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
