Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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