I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize