Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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