ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
