So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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