Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Houston, we have a squirter
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
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