I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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