I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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