my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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