My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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