id be glad to
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
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