I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
