I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
