I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Randomize
