I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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