ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
