You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
