TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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