Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
and you fell through a lawn chair
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