Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
