i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
