I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
