I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
This girl is more easily done than said...
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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