But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
She is in my trunk
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Randomize
