Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?