I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
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