Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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