I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Who wears a wallet chain?!
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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