That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
