I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
