i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
