break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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